Yesterday was a fun day with my daughter and daughter-in-law. We took Zayin and Scarlett to the Kids Zone in Sherwood Park, at least I think that's what it's called. I have to say that I like it way more than Chucky Cheese, lots of room to play, bright and clean, healthy choices for food and on a rainy Monday afternoon, why not?
Todays Question: "Do you ever have to face your fears to ensure you are not impacting someone else?"
Like your grandson for example. The play area is parent permissive, translation, parents are allowed to climb the enitre maze, go down the slides, walk on the nets, even at my size...yikes. So when mommy got tired it was Grandmas turn. So up the padded, netted maze I went. Zayin climbing with ease and Grandma thinking..."Are you kidding, that net won't hold me." Fear often stopped me for a moment, I took steps close to the edges of those nets thinking they must be stronger than the middle that sagged when I stepped on it. I would like it if everything was padded with no nets, those hard plastic areas killed my knees. Zayin was having a great time. We worked our way to the top where the big boy slide was. Problem...Grandma may be a big girl...but she is not a "big" girl. Zayin looked into the slide and appeared ready, Grandma got scared and pointed him in a different direction. The thought of him whipping down that slide alone with no one at the bottom to catch him made me sick to my stomach. The thought of me on the slide with him caused visions of dead children at the bottom. Horribly crushed by a fearful sliding Grandma who was sure she weighed too much to be in this maze.
Enter Tessa. She was sitting with Chantel and Scarlett while I was sweating it out in the maze. Why did she show up? "Mom you can send Zayin down the slide, I'll catch him at the bottom." I nearly yelled out, "Praise God." Since we were already close to that big, ugly, dark, narrow, plastic slide of death I decided to at least let Zayin have fun. "Okay Tessa, I'll send him down." So I sat my innocent little Grandson on the plastic entrance, looked down the dark hole and thought, glad it's him and not me. Until. He looked down the hole, he looked at me, realized I wasn't coming and he wanted out. I couldn't blame him and I wouldn't force him, so off we went. I only made it to the first net outside the slide when I realized, I'm passing my fear onto Zayin. Quick pep talk, get over it Jenny, face your fears you weeny it's a kiddy slide. So, Grandma encouraged Zayin to come and down the drop of doom we went. Way too fast, way too narrow and still afraid I'd seriously mame or kill someones child if I hit them, I slid with my Grandson held safely against me. He wasn't the only one happy to see his mommy at the bottom. I was so happy he didn't say...some more Mama...more.
So at 51 I'm still learning to face my fears, and still working very hard not to pass my fear onto someone else. I had to do the same thing with my children every time I'd go into a basement with them, or they wanted to go to play in one. Scarey. At least it was for me. I did not want them having my fears and I made sure I didn't give them to them with much effort. The fact that they ride rollarcoasters, motorcycyles, parachute out of planes, and a host of other things that I would never do, proves that with effort you can keep your fears to yourself. I think that is something we should all work on.
I learned alot going down that kiddy slide but the best lesson, fear is and will always be the opposite of faith. I will to walk in faith. I will also not be jumping out of a plane anytime soon, irrational fear must be conquered, logical fear must be studied and then making the decision that suits you best must be followed.
My Prayer: Lord help us to walk in faith remembering that you will always be greater than our fear."
Be Blessed with a Wonderful Day
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