Fast to Semi-Fast

I'm going from a full out fast to a semi-fast now, so glad to write that. I am glad I made it this far, Monday's sickness, led to Tuesday's fruit and veggies being added. And Wednesday was the same with some added things, like an egg with my spinach salad and a small piece of pizza with the meat picked off. I seriously didn't think I'd do that well after Monday.

Todays Question: "Do you ever suprise yourself?"

In the past if I got sick I can assure you I'd have declared the fast over. If there is one thing I know about myself it's that when I'm sick denying myself is NOT allowed. I'm sure that's a leftover from my childhood, my mom always fed us when we were sick. Toast was the thing I wanted the most and it was very hard not to give in to that. I have made a giant leap...well at least a big jump forward...and I truly was surprised by that. I thought seriously about having that toast several times. By last night, after a yam and some raw carrots for dinner, I couldn't do it anymore, I tossed my white flag out for a small piece of pizza and Gord's crusts. Just two crusts. It was wonderful, I'm sorry I can't lie, I don't remember anything ever tasting that good. I'm a bread-aholic.

So now what...semi-fast. Still searching yes, but do have more answers. I noticed last night when I made the decision to eat that pizza, that I made a conscious decision. I didn't dive in and come up for air once all pieces were devoured. I thought about eating more when I got home and packaged the leftovers. Didn't! I decided that I'd fast with bread, fruits, veggies, eggs and moderate cheese. I can live with that. For how long? Until I honestly feel like I've got the grip I was looking for.

I'm not one to deny myself, and I think that needs to change. I can in part and of course do, but on a whole, when it comes to food, I like having what I want. Just don't like paying the price. I think that's a character flaw. Not good. One day I'm going to go looking to find out what's wrong with me and maybe I won't find anything. I'm thinking I'll be in heaven with Jesus when that happens. :)

My Prayer: "Lord looking inward, not always easy, looking up, much better. Please change our inwards with the help available from the upwards."

Be Blessed with a Wonderful Day